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Empowering Women to Lead and Succeed

PWH Blog - Insights


  • 09/30/2016 1:18 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)
    Enid Oquendo Sometimes I need a reality check to make sure I am following the right path.  I observe, learn, ask questions, etc.  At some point I want to have the feeling that I did my best to the best of my ability.  Dave Myers, mentor, and boss was asked to do a Development Presentation to get professionals excited about their careers, in which I knew he was the best person for it.  After some brainstorming and exchanges of information, he thought we all need a pick me up - not only the young professionals but those who are in the middle of their careers as well!  It helped me create a career map, let’s see what it inspires you to do…..This is Part I. 

      1.       Who inspired you? Dave Myers

    Inspiration comes from all directions; sometimes we don’t realize we don’t need to go far to be inspired or to inspire others.  Look around you, look back when you were a kid and you began to feel passionate about things.  Maybe back then it was a hobby, sport, activity or anything you enjoyed doing.  Today, whether we need to find the spark again or keep it going, inspiration will come to you once you think back about those who inspired you to land where you are today. 
     
    Think about the following:  you foundation - your support - your confidence builder.

    Who has kept you on track? 
     
    2.       By now, you are inspired and have found the spark -

            Let’s get ready to get closer to the finish line.

            A LEADER IS:
    • Someone who leads by example - someone who values diverse, versatile, complete knowledge of the business
    • Someone who leads by example - someone who works smart
    • Someone who leads by example - someone who never loses sight of the objectives

    3.     Leadership Matters Today!

    • Larger and more global organizations
    • Changing global economy
    • Leaner organization structures
    • Increased importance of human capital
    • Growing leadership capacity
    • Developing strong, career-long leaders
    • More dynamic labor markets
    • Enhanced leader pipeline to offset demographic trends

    SO, HOW DO WE DEVELOP AS LEADERS?

    4.     Step 1-Learning Through

            JOB EXPERIENCE

    • Accept new work, new projects
    • Volunteer for a project
    • Learn from your mistakes
    • Take time to reflect and start a professional journey
    • Use feedback to try a new approach to an old problem

            RELATIONSHIPS

    • Work/shadow with colleagues who excel in the competency of your interest - PWH!
    • Get a mentor - PWH!
    • Seek advice, opinions, sound out ideas - PWH!

            THE INDUSTRY

    • Get involved
    • Engage in functional learning opportunities (i.e. HIDA conference)
    • Read books, professional industry blogs
     5.  Step 2- Your Professional Lifecycle
    • Transformation - A fundamental shift in how one sees the world, careers, relationships
    • Re-shaping Patterns of Thinking - Revising frames of reference, how one sees the world, and assumptions about the way things work
    • Incremental Improvement - New skills, doing things better

    Commit-drive-discipline-attitude-time-execute-lead-listen-observe-ask-manage-inspire-aspire-grow-measure-persistent-persevere

    6.   Step 3 - Training vs. Development

          Know the difference and do both
    • Training is transactional - Development is transformational
    • Training maintains status quo - Development catalyzes innovation
    • Training is finite - Development is infinite
    • Training tests patience - Development tests courage
    • Training focuses on the present - Development focuses on the future

          In summary, everything is a process in which we all have the opportunity to learn the key skills to be successful.  Ask yourself; how far do you want to go?

    Stay tuned for Part II!

    About the Author:

    Enid Oquendo is the Director, Supplier Relations for Concordance Healthcare Solutions in Tiffin, Ohio



  • 09/01/2016 2:43 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)
    In today’s work environment we are all trying to get more done with less. At times many of us feel overwhelmed and exhausted, leading to increased stress levels and the feeling that we are getting nowhere fast. If you’re having a difficult time getting things done, then you may want to try these five tips to boost your productivity:


    1. Try the “Seinfeld Strategy”

    Jerry Seinfeld once gave a fellow comic the advice to get a wall calendar and put an “X” on each day that you write a joke. Work on it every day. Once you start getting consistent with writing every day… try to not break the chain. This was his way of ensuring that he was working on his craft every day and getting things done. The idea of consistency behind his method is a driver to help build better work ethic in the form of a daily regimen to boost productivity.


    2. Get your workout gear ready ahead of time.

    Working out in the morning is a great way to boost your metabolism and get your creative mind working. No matter what your workout regimen is, getting ready for it ahead of time will help you achieve your fitness and health goals by making it easier for you to get started in the morning. If you have things ready it will minimize the possibility skipping your workout the next day. You can see benefits (including reduced sluggishness) from exercising as little as seven minutes every morning.

    3. Read a good book before bed.

    So often, it’s sleep deprivation that hinders productivity. Not being able to keep your eyes open or your mind focused is a HUGE problem that so many of us face.  We’re all trying to get so many things done in “such little” time! Reading before bed is a great way to settle your mind and prepare yourself for restful sleep.  Find yourself a real book that you can enjoy and set aside time each night before bed to read it. Even if you only have ten minutes to set aside for this task, you’ll soon find yourself looking forward to reading and sleeping better without the stresses of life bogging you down at bedtime. Getting in solid, restful sleep each night will help you be more productive (and awake) during the day.

    4. Forget time management.


    We are always told that time management is a skill that we all must have and master to be productive. One habit to try is to manage your ENERGY instead of your time! Find out what time of the day you are naturally more productive (the morning or late afternoon, for example). At that time when your creative energy is highest, work on the tasks and projects that require the most active thinking/hard work. Essentially, the idea is to structure your day around your most productive time by moving the pieces of your schedule around so that it complements your natural energy levels. This may be viewed as difficult to accomplish in some work environments, however, it’s worth a try asking your boss and/or colleagues if they mind letting you try blocking off a certain number of hours each day at the same time to complete specific tasks and projects. Once they see the benefit, it may be a non-issue (and they may want to try it, too).

    5. Decide on three things you want to accomplish each day.

    Simply identifying the top three things that you want to accomplish for the day can be a big win for your productivity. Once decided, focus on accomplishing these three things. Every day may not be a win at first, but once you get used to the idea, you’ll have a better understanding of what can get done in a day and will start to set achievable, challenging goals that will help you get to the finish line of your to-do lists! Every day that you reach your goals you will feel a sense of achievement and the challenge to do so again the next day.

    Get Started Now!

    Everyday can be a challenge when you have what seems to be an infinite number of things on your plate. Don’t get discouraged. Instead, start boosting your productivity now by implementing at least one of the five tips in this post into your daily regimen… starting today! Which tip would be easiest for you to try? Scroll back up, pick a tip, and decide to make it a part of your daily routine. You can do it! Start now, try it TODAY.

  • 08/16/2016 1:42 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    Susan KaiserDr. Anne Eiting Klamar (Anne) speaks passionately about mentoring. As both a mentor and a mentee over several years, she understands that having a mentor is a valuable resource. Anne believes a good mentor will help coach you, not judge you, and encourage you to think a little differently.

    Anne pointed out that mentors will likely change throughout one’s life. Her mentors of twenty years ago are not the same ones she has today, but they all helped shape her thought leadership… helped her think about how she would approach a particular situation and assisted in her development.

    Some larger companies offer internal mentoring programs, but not everyone may feel they have the luxury of being totally open and honest with someone from their own company. I asked Anne how one should choose a mentor and where to look for one. Should you try to choose someone from the same company in which you work or an external person? Anne encourages others to look for a mentor in several areas and to choose different types of mentors for different goals. For business purposes, she suggests considering a mentor who is on a board of directors. For health and wellness, you may want to choose a physical fitness mentor. And, you may even wish to choose a mentor for spiritual guidance. When choosing a mentor, you should think about each relationship. Ask yourself – what can I gain from it… and what can I bring to the relationship?

    When choosing a mentor, Anne believes the most important factor is to choose a person that you respect… and respect their values. Secondly, think about yourself and how you relate to others. Anne stated that she is sensitive by nature, and appreciates someone who makes her want to respond positively… someone who will motivate her.

    I asked Anne what she would say to others who do a great deal of networking, but who had not yet reached out to someone as a mentor.  She encourages these people to take it a step further, to step out in courage… lean into a little discomfort. Also, think about what you can bring to the relationship. As a mentee, you have to take that first step.

    Anne’s passion about the importance of mentoring is pure. She made me think differently about mentoring – think about how a mentor could be beneficial for my own career, think more about what I can bring to the relationship and also about having different types of mentors, not just one.   

    I hope you will attend the webinar this week to hear more from Anne about her own mentoring experiences, and what role it has played in her career to make her the executive and leader she is today.


    About the Author:
    Susan is the Public Relations Manager for Midmark Corporation, a leading healthcare equipment manufacturer and service/solutions provider for the medical, dental and animal health markets. She is responsible for PR planning and media relations, as well as Midmark's overall social media strategy and policy. In addition, she is currently President-Elect for the Public Relations Society of America - Dayton Chapter.

  • 08/09/2016 8:15 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    Patty CiscoAs a professional today, it’s essential to stay on top of industry trends and competitor changes to bring your very best to your organization.  One of my favorite avenues is to read online e-newsletters from credible sources.  Yet that brings another element of complexity to my already hectic schedule — I have to manage all of the e-newsletters I signed up for (and those I didn’t).  What’s the secret?

    Be Selective

    It can be very difficult to make the decision of whether you should or shouldn’t subscribe to an e-newsletter to begin with.  On the surface the e-newsletter may look great — however, the last thing you need or want is to be bothered with junk in your inbox.

    The key is to be selective and only sign up for an e-newsletter that clearly defines the benefits you will receive from subscribing to the e-newsletter.  In addition, it should convey the frequency you will receive emails and convey that it will not sell or share your email address.

    Finally, look for an avenue that allows you to unsubscribe from the list easily any time you wish.

    Being selective can save a lot of wasted time later on!  Don’t give companies a reason to interrupt your day with unwanted emails.

    Trash it!  Unsubscribe

    This may sound strange, but one of my goals on my vacation this summer was to unsubscribe to e-newsletters that I no longer found valuable.  Why?  Because on average everyday I was receiving over 75 e-newsletters and after scanning the subject lines, I found myself only opening about 25 and reading only about 10 every day.  I was tired of feeling stressed out at the end of each day sorting through all of those e-newsletters with very little return.

    Using a small amount of time each day on my vacation,  I reduced by e-newsletter count down to 25 per day  and gained about 15 minutes in each day!  Awesome!  Now I not only have more time, but I also find myself actually enjoying and taking away more quality information that I can use from the few e-newsletters that I do follow.

    In this unsubscribe process, I found that I was receiving several duplicate emails at different times of the day from the same source. My research revealed that I was signed up to receive every email that company offered such as their daily news, special offers, weekly overview etc -I quickly unsubscribed to those that I didn’t want and didn’t even know I was signed up for!

    I also noticed that I was receiving emails from companies that I had made purchases from, even though I didn’t even know I had provided permission to receive them.  I’m now alert to online purchases and checking the box or un-clicking the auto-subscribe button.  The same holds true for in-store purchasing.  Be careful when they ask for your email address because they will be connecting with you.

    The most frustrating e-newsletters are those that don’t offer an avenue to unsubscribe!  This is completely unacceptable, and an abuse of digital marketing. Take the time to email the sender and request to be removed from their list or you will report them to the Federal Trade Commission for spamming.

    Although I haven’t personally used this handy online application, Unroll Me is a free tool where you can globally pull all of your e-newsletters in one location and select the ones you want to unsubscribe to. It looks interesting and should be worth a try.

    Final Thoughts

    Over time, the sheer volume of e-newsletters you receive can be quite overwhelming.  Like any other form of information you receive online or off, you only have time to process so much information in a day.  Thus taking the time periodically to clean up your e-newsletter subscriptions can gain time in your day.  If you’re tech savvy, you may find an online tool like Feedly helpful in data mining information for you.  Time is precious so be sure to manage how you spend it!

    Author:  Patty Cisco, MBA & Principal, Marketing Essentials

    As founder of Marketing Essentials, Patty’s continual quest and drive for helping businesses grow is her passion. With over 30 years of strategic business management and leadership experience, she is known as a catalyst and understands the challenges CEOs and Marketing Directors face in executing inbound digital marketing & sales strategies that yield results. No surprise you will find her feeding her hunger for lifelong learning with a good book and latte!

    Patty Cisco, MBA, Principal

    Marketing Essentials

     


  • 07/26/2016 8:15 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    A Review of the June 22nd Webinar with Gloria Feldt

    Tamara TaylorIn this webinar Gloria Feldt helped us to realize that power is in our hands and that we, as women, need to recognize it. Over the past twenty years, women have been earning 50% of all college degrees and landing in only 18% of top leadership positions across all sectors of the economy. In addition, the existing pay gap between men and women continues to take its toll. As it turns out, the cost to all women as a result of the pay gap is that we earn over $400,000 less then men who work in the same positions. That amount balloons to over $1,000,000 for women with college degrees as compared to their male peers. Furthermore, there are consequences to organizations if women are not included in leadership, including:  limited viewpoints, women’s lens is underrepresented in products/services, and companies are unaligned with the marketplace.


    There are barriers and biases existing that are hindering women from Gloria Feldtacquiring leadership positions in organizations. Implicit (unconscious) biases that exist include: assumptions, beliefs, painful truths, stereotypes, and both seen and unseen biases about gender. Gloria noted that an example of this is when a behavior is exhibited by both a man and a woman and is interpreted differently for each sex. She shared a quote from Sheryl Sandberg stating that “Success and likeability are positively correlated for men and negatively correlated for women.” This means that the more successful a man is the more likeable he is while the opposite is often true for women. This is a considerable factor contributing to the hindrance of our ability as women to move forward into leadership positions. Further hindering our ability are behavioral traits that are inherent to women. Gloria noted that psychological studies show that women will work 22% longer than men before they feel they have earned their money and that they value their work 19% less than men. In addition, women don’t typically “toot their horn” and are four times less likely to ask for a raise or promotion than their male colleagues in similar positions.


    As women, it is important for us to recognize that what got you ahead in school could keep you back in your career and leadership. A significant power moment for Gloria was when she was introduced to the quote from Sojourner Truth that says “If women want more rights than what they’ve got, why don’t they just take them?” She later decided to embrace her “Power TO” upon researching women in politics for a magazine article. It was at that time that she learned that a main reason that there are so few women running for President is that women must be asked multiple times before they decide to move forward. On average, by the time the woman makes the decision to move toward with running there is typically a male candidate that is already the incumbent and it’s hard to beat an incumbent.


    A poll of the webinar attendees pointed out that most women on the call felt that they are becoming comfortable with power but were short of fully embracing it. Gloria urges all of us to decide what we want to do with your Power TO and focus on our intentions of how we will get it done. After writing multiple books related to women and leadership, Gloria started Take the Lead, an organization that “prepares, develops, inspires, and propels women to take their fair and equal share of leadership positions by 2025.” In essence, the organization focuses on the idea that successful female leadership requires the exercise of the “Power TO” which focuses on leadership, teamwork, trust, solving problems, infinite possibilities, and making you feel powerful. She wants us all to know that women’s purpose in the 21st century is to walk through the doors that were opened in the 20th century.



  • 07/19/2016 4:24 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    In a world that is rapidly increasing in complexity, a focus on execution is one way to keep moving forward even when the path seems unclear.

     

    Our plans don’t fail because they are poorly crafted but more often because we fail to execute the plan

    Fortunately, there are “disciplines of execution” that can be learned and applied.

     

    A discipline of execution is more than working hard and getting things done, it is about alignment and accountability.

    Randy Chittum, PH.D.


    Let’s get personal with Randy Chittum, PH.D, before he walks us through best practices of great execution; work through a challenge or goal, and discuss how the principles of execution can be used to align teamwork and gain commitment. 

     

     

    1.       What motivates you to be the best you can be?Randy Chittum

     

    I genuinely believe that the workplace has become the primary social institutions where we “discover” ourselves and our identities get clarified and developed.  For this reason, organizations have a much bigger impact on our lives than we even realize.  Working with leaders allows me to have some small impact into that dynamic that has such a disproportionate impact on society.

     

    2.       Where does your passion come from?  Any particular milestone you would like to share?

     

    I am driven by a desire to have workplaces be more compassionate places.  That should not be confused with not having expectations and accountability.  In fact, learning those things is one of the primary benefits of being in an organization.  As other social institutions deteriorate, organizations are becoming a place where our best selves can emerge.  Unfortunately, not all places play this role well.  I believe that the successful organizations of tomorrow will have this as an important part of their thinking.

     

    3.    If you were to give an advice to a young professional or an experienced professional getting ready to retire, what would that be?

     

    My advice to a young professional would be to use your “inexperience” to see what others have stopped seeing.  However, you have to earn the right to share that and have others take you seriously.

     

    My advice to a retiring professional would be to double-down on your relationships (we know that people are happier and healthier as they age if their relationships are meaningful) and your purpose.  Be challenged by something that is also a contribution to your community.

     

    4.       What helps you keep your own personal discipline?

     

    This presupposes a level of discipline that might not actually exist.  To the extent that I have discipline, it is rooted in the desire to do meaningful work and have a purposeful life.  Everything has a line back to one or both of those.  I believe we are generally more motivated by things that contribute to a larger sense of purpose in our lives.

     

    5.       What do you spend most of your time doing?

     

    My work life is consumed by trying to understand more about what makes for effective leadership in increasingly complex times.  This understanding tends to emerge through the work I do at Georgetown where we bring best thinking together, and the work I do in organizations which “tests” what I think we know at GU.  This iterative work is slowly adding to my understanding of what is needed to lead in a world that is yet to fully exist.

     

    My personal life is equally consumed simply by a desire to be in deep relationship with others.  Starting naturally with my wife (and even my dog), and extending to professional colleagues and personal community.  When I want to disrupt that lovely way of being . . . I play golf.

     

    Look forward to speaking with all of you at the webinar!

     

    About the Author:


    Enid Oquendo is the Director, Supplier Relations for Concordance Healthcare Solutions
    in Tiffin, Ohio

     


  • 07/12/2016 8:52 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    Probably get more work done and get our lives back!

    In a recent study by Adobe Systems, it was determined that the average worker spends 30 hours per week checking email!!  What??!!  This is simply unbelievable!  However, if you think about it, not only are we checking email while at work, we have our Smart Phones with us 24-hours a day – we could be checking email while watching television, while in a restaurant with our families, sitting at our child’s sporting events, walking down the street and even after we’ve gone to bed!  It’s insanity!

    I recently tracked my own time spent checking email while at work, and I averaged 6 hours per week, which does make me feel better… but that’s still a lot time spent just reading emails and responding, and I will admit – sometimes I miss some of them, or I don’t have time to respond right away. That being said, I could probably spend at least 8 hours per week checking email if I allowed myself to do that. That’s a full day of work!  

    Most of us have spam filters within our email, and that helps, but there are other ways you can decrease the amount of time you are spending in email, allowing yourself to be more productive – and work on the things you should be working on! Here are a few tips that may help you save time in email:

    •  Block out time in your calendar to check email. Research shows that if you constantly check your email as it comes in, you will spend more time on email.
    • Take off the email notification. If you’re under pressure to meet a deadline, only to have a pop-up window notify that “you have mail”, you will probably check it – and more than likely, it will not be that important.
    • Use keyboard shortcuts for good email management. These can dramatically reduce your time on email.
    • Delete and mute a conversation in email. Outlook can help tune out the messages that are irrelevant to you in one fell swoop. It can delete all messages in a thread and move future messages in the conversation to the deleted items folder.
    • And finally… don’t “reply all” if not necessary! Group messages can get out of hand, causing an endless email thread. Know when to “reply” vs. “reply all” vs. “BCC.”

    What time-savings tips have you found to be helpful when dealing with email? Please share!

    About the author:

    Susan is the Public Relations Manager for Midmark Corporation, a leading healthcare equipment manufacturer and service/solutions provider for the medical, dental and animal health markets. She is responsible for PR planning and media relations, as well as Midmark's overall social media strategy and policy. In addition, she is currently President-Elect for the Public Relations Society of America - Dayton Chapter.
  • 06/23/2016 10:49 AM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    Patty CiscoOn a scale of 1-3 (3 being the highest) how would you rate your average daily stress level at work?   Consider this, The European Agency for Safety and Health found that 550 million working days are lost every year in the U.S. from stress related time off. That statistic certainly gave me reason to pause and consider the impact that stress has on the management of my time and productivity at work.

    Effects of Work Stress

    Stress could be the root cause of serious health issues. According to stress management expert Deepak Chopra, extended stress has a detrimental effect on physical health because the body enters a "fight or flight" state and neglects other vital basic bodily functions like digestion.

    Stress also negatively impacts the alertness of the mind, and leads to a drowsy, non-productive state when the burst of adrenaline wears off. If you are under constant stress at work, you’re likely to be unhappy and less productive, which in turn affects your ability to manage your time.

    Stress Reduction Means Time Gained

    Everyone could probably benefit from a few simple adjustments at work to reduce stress and improve time management.  Here are a few quick tips I’ve found helpful:

    1.      Stand & stretch often. (I love my standing desk!)

    2.      Take mini walks outside in the fresh air and sunshine (even when it’s cold).

    3.      Don’t forget to drink water (not pop).

    4.      Identify a stress free place at work and use it when you need to decompress.

    5.      Don’t complain at work.  Find a trusted source to vent with outside of work and then let it go-don’t dwell on it.

    6.      Sit up straight and watch your posture. When we sit compacted or hunched over, we feel more stressed and less powerful. 

    7.      Eat frequent healthy mini meals instead of a heavy lunch.

    8.      Laugh a lot!

    9.      Keep what’s most important in your life the priority and keep everything else in perspective.

    10.  Start your day early with meditation or prayer.

    Final Thoughts

    We all have different stress triggers.  Be aware of what yours are at work and develop a plan to manage them and increase your productivity. Not only will you feel better, but I can assure you others will notice the change in your behavior as well!  Probably both at work and home.

    Author Bio

    As founder of Marketing Essentials, Patty’s continual quest and drive for helping businesses grow is her passion. With over 30 years of strategic business management and leadership experience, she is known as a catalyst and understands the challenges CEO’s and Marketing Directors face in executing inbound digital marketing & sales strategies that yield results. No surprise you will find her feeding her hunger for lifelong learning with a good book and latte!

    Patty Cisco, MBA, Principal

    Marketing Essentials

  • 05/25/2016 9:20 AM | Anonymous member (Administrator)


    We’ve all experienced.  That coworker, employee, or vendor  that sucks the life right out of you.  Perhaps their chatty, needy or simply have habits that annoy you, yet what you don’t realize is how much time from your day it takes to manage this person..   So instead we keep our frustration to ourselves or share it on the side with our peers.  Again time wasters!  So what’s the solution?

    Be Bold. Be Honest.

    I really never gave thought to this situation affecting my ability to manage my time, until I read the blog by Caroline Webb, How to Tell a Coworker They're Annoying You.

    Caroline says that it makes sense that whenever we’re working closely with other people, it’s easy for tensions to arise thanks to differences in personal styles and priorities. When they do, we have a choice: should we raise the issue, or keep quiet? Many of us bite our tongue, worrying that speaking up will harm an important relationship.

    But research suggests that letting something simmer can make things worse, for several reasons. When we’re stressed, our brain tends to mount a defensive “fight-flight-or-freeze” response—during which there’s reduced activity in brain areas. And trying to suppress our irritation has been found to make our brain’s defensive response more pronounced rather than less. So chanting “I’m fine” repeatedly is unlikely to get us back onto an even keel.
    Our supposedly hidden emotions are also strangely contagious. Psychologists have found that one person in a negative mood transmits their angst to others nearby within five minutes—even when they aren’t speaking to each other or working together. So your colleague will be subconsciously picking up your disapproving signals, whether you mean for them to read your mind or not.

    The good news is that there is a safe way to raise difficult issues with a colleague, even in awkward hierarchical situations—one that helps to keep both your brains from going on the defensive and that helps you set a positive tone for the conversation. According to Carolyn here’s how it works:

    Step 0: Set a collaborative intention.
    Before the conversation, ask yourself: “What outcome do I really want for my relationship with this person?”
    Early in my career, I had a boss who kept rewriting my work. Sometimes he twisted the syntax so badly that the sentences became difficult to understand, and his micromanagement was making me feel like a sulky teenager. I felt I had to say something. Without pausing to think about my intention for the conversation, my unspoken goal would have been: “make [damn] sure he realizes he’s driving me nuts!” That would have kept my brain firmly in “fight” mode. But five seconds of reflection led me to set a more collegiate goal: “find out why he’s doing what he’s doing, and figure out how to work together more effectively.” If emotions are contagious, that was going to be a much better vibe to radiate.

    Step 1: Ask permission.
    Don’t just launch into your spiel. Say something like: “Our working relationship is important to me, and there’s something on my mind—can I talk to you about it?” If it’s a bad time, you don’t want to choose this moment for your chat; if it’s a good time, you’ve signaled your collaborative intent.

    Step 2: Describe the “true facts.”
    The trick here is to pick one specific incident and describe what I call the “true facts”: the things you know for sure, stripped of emotion, interpretation, or generalization.  For me, that meant not saying things like “Your edits suck” or “You’re not giving me enough space.” These statements are debatable, because the other person can say “That’s not true.” And because they’re so broadly critical, they’re more likely to put your colleague’s brain on the defensive—meaning they won’t be at their most expansive and generous as they respond. Instead, aim for something that feels more like “What I noticed was [fact, fact, fact].” Be as precise and concrete as you can, even if you think there’s a big issue at stake. In my case, I said: “I noticed that in the last presentation, you rewrote the headings on fourteen of the twenty slides. The sentences got longer and less to-the-point.”

    Step 3: Say how the “true facts” made you feel, and why this matters to you.
    Just like the “true facts,” your feelings aren’t disputable, and describing them explains why you’re raising the issue. Research has also found that you lower your stress levels when you carefully label your emotions. So I said: “That made me feel worried that I’m not understanding what you want from me.” Here, it helps not to use aggressive language. I was angry, for sure—but when I asked myself what deeper fear was underneath that anger, I realized it was a genuine worry that I was falling short. It also helps to add a sincere explanation of why this matters to you, to convey that this isn’t about you whining. It doesn’t have to be complicated. I simply said: “And I care about doing a good job.”

    Step 4: Ask for their perspective.
    When we’ve built up our courage to broach a difficult topic, it’s easy to forget that we may not have the whole picture. In fact, we rarely do; we all suffer from a phenomenon known to scientists as “selective attention.” So make sure to ask: “What’s your perspective on this?” Pay real attention to their answer, even if you disagree. The idea is to understand what lies behind their behavior, to give you a better idea of how to solve the problem. In my case, it became clear that my manager’s goal had been to add what he called “more nuance” to my rather black-and-white messages. He wasn’t a skilled writer, so his edits weren’t very effective. But once I understood his aim, I could better see how to meet both his needs and mine.

    Step 5: Do some joint problem solving.
    Finally, decide together how to improve the situation. Try asking them for their thoughts on this first, before building on their suggestions. This isn’t about caving in to hierarchy; it’s because research shows that people feel far more attachment to any idea that they’ve had a hand in shaping. So before I said “okay, here’s what I’ll do differently in the future, and here’s how I’d like to get input from you,” it paid dividends for me to ask: “what can I do to introduce more of the subtlety you’re missing?”

    Closing Thoughts
    It’s amazing when we take a step back and really take an insightful look at our day what things we may find that are time suckers that we never even realized.   With the varying degrees of personalities, responsibilities and simply overall stress in the workplace, it is difficult to manage our feelings when working with others that annoy us.  However taking a proactive approach to managing the relationship not only promotes a positive atmosphere, it also frees up time in your day to focus on the priority things on your list.  I loved Caroline’s advice and put it to good use immediately! Share tips you find helpful to address working with annoying people.

    Resource:
    Caroline Webb is the author of How to Have a Good Day: Harness the Power of Behavioral Science to Transform Your Working Life. She is also CEO of coaching firm Sevenshift, and a Senior Adviser to McKinsey & Company.

    About Our Authors
    As an OEM Sales Service Representative for B. Braun Medical for over 10 years, Kristy Spairana is known for her strong leadership and team building skills among her peers. Her vast knowledge in areas of production and sales service makes her a valuable resource and asset in building and maintaining relationships with clients.  She loves to learn and is completing her Bachelor's Degree in Business Administration. Kristy thrives on personal development and finding new approaches to business management and shares her knowledge with others via her personal blog!
    Kristy L. Spairana , OEM Sales Service Representative
    B.Braun OEM Division 

    As founder of Marketing Essentials, Patty’s continual quest and drive for helping businesses grow is her passion. With over 30 years of strategic business management and leadership experience, she is known as a catalyst and understands the challenges CEO’s and Marketing Directors face in executing inbound digital marketing & sales strategies that yield results. No surprise you will find her feeding her hunger for lifelong learning with a good book and latte!
    Patty Cisco, MBA, Principal
    Marketing Essentials


  • 05/18/2016 1:00 PM | Anonymous member (Administrator)

    A Review of a Recent PWH Webinar - By Enid Oquendo, Seneca MedicalEnid Oquendo

    How to be a great leader without compromising your health, wellness and joy, presented by Dr. Suzie Carmack.

    What does well-being mean to you?

    Think about it, write it down, reflect on it

    Do any of these sound like you?

    I take work home frequently.

    I can ask for help but only if the situation is serious.

    In relationships, it is easier for me to give than to receive.

    It is important to put people at ease.

    I often feel used up at the end of the day.

    When I say no, I feel guilty.

    I am uncomfortable when others do not see me as being strong and self-sufficient.

    Work dominates much of my life.

    When does doing good for others, stop being good for you?

    ·        How do we balance our own well-being with the well-being of our team?

    ·        When does our drive to perform well as a leader become a health risk- - or even a disparity?

    ·        Can taking care of our well-being become an issue of safety and concern- for our own well-being and our organization?

    Its time to think about our well-being.  Lets put it into perspective

    Well-Being Summary- WB is conceptualized differently by each individual, making it hard to define and evaluate.  There is tension between what is good for us (longevity) and what feels good (quality of life).  Subjective (self) and Objective (other) evaluation of well-being matters. 

    Compassion Fatigue 101:  We have all been here before and may still be here.not knowing that Caring too much can hurt.  When caregivers focus on others without practicing self-care, destructive behaviors can surface.  Apathy, isolation, bottled up emotions and substance abuse head a long list of symptoms associated with the secondary traumatic stress disorder now labeled: Compassion Fatigue.                                                              

    How does this happen?

    We humans are happy when we help others.

    (Social support = Well-being)

    You are happy when you fulfill your meaning and purpose in your work as a healer. 

    (Meaning and Purpose = Well-being)

    Positive reinforcement from the world (which values high performance at all costs)

     = Super-charged Outflow

    OUTFLOW MUST BE BALANCED WITH INFLOW-UNLESS YOU ARE A SUPER-HERO

    Dr. Carmacks Ultimatum - the 3 Ss:  

    Self-Care Daily, Social Support Weekly, Services Monthly

    Self-Care Daily- means to mobilize and move, eat well, sleep, digital detox, mindfulness (Gratitude), non-work endeavors.  Social Support Weekly: spend time with friends and family, buddy system, peer support.  Services Monthly:  work on your relationships, mind and body, legal, financial, medical, career

    Lets Get Started!  YOUR WELL-BEING ULTIMATUM

    Create a Step 1 through 10 Step-process- This is your New Business Plan- Write the following steps down, be the author of your life-

    Step 1- Vision Statement for your life and well-being.
    Step 2- Mission Statement
    Step 3- SWOT Analysis
    Step 4- OWB-SWAT Analysis
    Step 5- SWB Stakeholder Analysis
    Step 6- Annual Goals
    Step 7- Monthly Goals
    Step 8- Weekly Practices
    Step 9- Daily Practices
    Step 10- The Well-Being Ultimatum Contract.   

    Now lets get to work!

    Reflection- Dr. Carmacks webinar opens the door to what I often call for a soul searching activity.  I knew I had some difficulties balancing my well-being, but I didnt know how deep I was into the hole.  So, I started to work on my 10- Steps Ultimatum Plan, created a plan to get the balance right, to get centered.  That includes posting the plan in my kitchen to remind myself every day that I have a plan now.  Factor in all that is important in my life to continue moving towards my career goal.  My biggest learning was the importance on working through all that has an impact to help reach my highest potential.  Without having a healthy well-being life, I would only be getting deeper into the hole.  Just a matter of time!  So, lets climb up, design the plan, and lets get to work!

    Stay in touch with Dr. Suzie Carmack,   PhD, MFA, MEd, ERYT, PMA -CPT Dr. Suzie Carmack

    Amazon, Twitter, Facebook.

    Email: letsgetcentered@gmail.com


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